moreofmorton:

boss-man-bing:

raideo:

spookyelric:

sphynx-prince:

yungcoochie:

bankston:

goodreasonnews:

amazingatheist:

I’m so glad to see the younger generation waking up to this hypocrisy. 

The homeowner at 22 one is killing me.

…………………….

This meme makes me so angry because it’s so on-target.

I am screaming

this isn’t even funny to me it just makes me want to find the nearest baby boomer and deck them in the mouth

I reblog this every time because it always re-ignites my anger.

I feel you sphynx-prince.  

Yet the never stop yelling at you to get your shit together.

I feel this in new ways every time I look at it.

2 hours ago with 225248 notes — via blisslovehappiness, org seriouslyamerica



bookishbutcorruptible:

thisiskaylaerin:

Sunday Cosplay is the best

HOLY MOTHERFUCK SHIT GOD BLESS YOU

3 hours ago with 92772 notes — via ishipzalldathings, org thisiskaylaerin




2,617,453 plays

supremewhitegirl:

dendropsyche:

thenimbus:

bonbonbunny:

'What kind of overalls does Mario wear?'

image

Yep, I laughed out loud

I love the “oh no” like he fucking knows he’s going to hear a shitty ass joke

this is the stupidest fucking joke in the world but i laugh every fucking time without fail

5 hours ago with 410668 notes — via wckdjon, org youtube.com



notactuallycute:

Drastic Measures

Claim:   A pet python acting ‘affectionate’ is really just measuring its intended victim.
Origins:   Although stories like the ones presented above about snake owners being dangerously unaware that their pets are calmly sizing them up as the main courses of their next meals are interesting, they should be classified with other fictional tales of snake scarelore on the following bases:
Pythons don’t measure their prey before going after their meals: They grab, they squeeze, they eat. There’s little fretting in their nature about relative sizes of intended edibles, nor does all that much go into their thinking process.
To look at it another way, if pythons were in the habit of measuring before striking, they’d likely starve. Most of their prey wouldn’t willingly wait for them to finish mimicking tape measures before consenting to be eaten; they would hop away to safety as soon as they noticed large snakes stretching out alongside them.
For a snake to slurp up large prey whole, it would not only have to be at least as long as its prospective dinner, but it would also have to be capable of ingesting the width of that prey — simply measuring length wouldn’t be a sufficiently reliable guide to what a snake could ingest. And while a really big snake could indeed swallow a person’s arm, it’s quite unlikely that the kinds of snakes typically kept as pets in homes could get their jaws open wide enough to take in an adult human’s head and shoulders.
Those who keep fairly large snakes as pets generally know that it’s perfectly normal for their pets to go without food for fairly long periods of time and thus scoff at the notion that a snake’s not eating would be cause to rush it to a vet.
No reasonably informed vet would counsel having a snake put down because it hadn’t eaten of late and thus must be planning to make a meal of its owner. (There are other methods for dealing with non-eating snakes, including, in extreme circumstances, force-feeding.)
Some elements of the legend were reflected in a February 2008 news story out of Australia involving the swallowing of a family dog by a snake. According to news accounts of the incident, the Peric family (husband, wife, and two children) watched in horror as their chihuahua was gobbled up by a 16 ft. scrub python on the veranda of their home in tropical Kuranda, Queensland. Although the snake wasn’t a pet (it lived in the wild), Mr. Daniel Peric maintained that prior to the fatal attack the python had stalked the family’s dog for days. (Four days before the pooch became the snake’s dinner, the python had reportedly 
been seen in the dog’s bed on the veranda.) This family had trouble with snakes before: The body of the Perics’ cat had been found in the preceding weeks, looking as if something had tried to swallow it, and a week prior to the dog’s demise a smaller python ate their pet guinea pig. Regardless of the realities of serpentine behavior, the legend about a snake-measured girl is popular because it gives voice to a widespread fear of that which slithers. Herpetologists aside, many people view snakes as dangerous and unwholesome, perhaps even evil, and therefore feel uncomfortable and somewhat threatened in their presence. Stories like this one serve to confirm such assessments as not only is the “pet” in the tale planning to eat a person, but is stealthily and sneakily working out when to make its move, all under the guise of being affectionate towards the people caring for it. (Interestingly, the fear people seem to be expressing in repeating this story is not of being killed by a snake, but rather of being eaten by one.) The veterinarian who reveals the true state of things is a stock figure who appears in other urban legends, such as the ”Choking Doberman” (burglar’s fingers found in the throat of a guard dog reveal danger lurking in a closet at home) and the ”Mexican Pet”(languishing “dog” adopted in a foreign land exposed as giant rat). Such an expert is needed to fill in the blanks in these narratives — in this case, without the vet’s helpful explanation to clue us in, we wouldn’t have known the ill-intentioned snake was “measuring” the girl, or what its purpose was for doing so. Barbara “serpent up hostilities” Mikkelson 

notactuallycute:

Drastic Measures

Claim:   A pet python acting ‘affectionate’ is really just measuring its intended victim.

Origins:   Although stories like the ones presented above about snake owners being dangerously unaware that their pets are calmly sizing them up as the main courses of their next meals are interesting, they should be classified with other fictional tales of snake scarelore on the following bases:

  • Pythons don’t measure their prey before going after their meals: They grab, they squeeze, they eat. There’s little fretting in their nature about relative sizes of intended edibles, nor does all that much go into their thinking process.
  • To look at it another way, if pythons were in the habit of measuring before striking, they’d likely starve. Most of their prey wouldn’t willingly wait for them to finish mimicking tape measures before consenting to be eaten; they would hop away to safety as soon as they noticed large snakes stretching out alongside them.
  • For a snake to slurp up large prey whole, it would not only have to be at least as long as its prospective dinner, but it would also have to be capable of ingesting the width of that prey — simply measuring length wouldn’t be a sufficiently reliable guide to what a snake could ingest. And while a really big snake could indeed swallow a person’s arm, it’s quite unlikely that the kinds of snakes typically kept as pets in homes could get their jaws open wide enough to take in an adult human’s head and shoulders.
  • Those who keep fairly large snakes as pets generally know that it’s perfectly normal for their pets to go without food for fairly long periods of time and thus scoff at the notion that a snake’s not eating would be cause to rush it to a vet.
  • No reasonably informed vet would counsel having a snake put down because it hadn’t eaten of late and thus must be planning to make a meal of its owner. (There are other methods for dealing with non-eating snakes, including, in extreme circumstances, force-feeding.)

Some elements of the legend were reflected in a February 2008 news story out of Australia involving the swallowing of a family dog by a snake. According to news accounts of the incident, the Peric family (husband, wife, and two children) watched in horror as their chihuahua was gobbled up by a 16 ft. scrub python on the veranda of their home in tropical Kuranda, Queensland. Although the snake wasn’t a pet (it lived in the wild), Mr. Daniel Peric maintained that prior to the fatal attack the python had stalked the family’s dog for days. (Four days before the pooch became the snake’s dinner, the python had reportedly 

been seen in the dog’s bed on the veranda.) This family had trouble with snakes before: The body of the Perics’ cat had been found in the preceding weeks, looking as if something had tried to swallow it, and a week prior to the dog’s demise a smaller python ate their pet guinea pig. 

Regardless of the realities of serpentine behavior, the legend about a snake-measured girl is popular because it gives voice to a widespread fear of that which slithers. Herpetologists aside, many people view snakes as dangerous and unwholesome, perhaps even evil, and therefore feel uncomfortable and somewhat threatened in their presence. Stories like this one serve to confirm such assessments as not only is the “pet” in the tale planning to eat a person, but is stealthily and sneakily working out when to make its move, all under the guise of being affectionate towards the people caring for it. (Interestingly, the fear people seem to be expressing in repeating this story is not of being killed by a snake, but rather of being eaten by one.) 

The veterinarian who reveals the true state of things is a stock figure who appears in other urban legends, such as the Choking Doberman (burglar’s fingers found in the throat of a guard dog reveal danger lurking in a closet at home) and the Mexican Pet(languishing “dog” adopted in a foreign land exposed as giant rat). Such an expert is needed to fill in the blanks in these narratives — in this case, without the vet’s helpful explanation to clue us in, we wouldn’t have known the ill-intentioned snake was “measuring” the girl, or what its purpose was for doing so. 

Barbara “serpent up hostilities” Mikkelson 

6 hours ago with 142 notes — via butthurtherpetologist, org snopes.com



bagmilk:

never has a gif set described my entire life so perfectly

8 hours ago with 378960 notes — via smilingsword, org thelostie



did-you-kno:

Source 

did-you-kno:

Source 

9 hours ago with 5003 notes — via did-you-kno



vvankinq:

Peeing in a public toilet like

image

11 hours ago with 248133 notes — via blisslovehappiness, org vvankinq



"Periods aren’t an excuse to get out of anything."
— People who have never experienced blood pouring out of their genitals (via wiifitting)
12 hours ago with 116244 notes — via blisslovehappiness, org wiifitting



sildachi:

sildachi:

sildachi:

who does polyphemus hate more than odysseus

nobody

guys please it’s a literature joke i need your support on this

14 hours ago with 135818 notes — via fastlaines, org rivalstruck



camerapits:

noobtheloser:

quotes-n-hoes:

This is an ancient Roman amulet for luck. Yes those are flying penises.

Also of note, the Roman god of marriage, Mutunus Tutunus, whose name is derived from two Latin slang words for penis. His name is essentially Dick Wiener. If you have ever wondered just how much like us the Romans were, read the etymology section. 

Oh look.
It’s a flying fuck.
It used to be given, and now look, it’s no more.

camerapits:

noobtheloser:

quotes-n-hoes:

This is an ancient Roman amulet for luck. Yes those are flying penises.

Also of note, the Roman god of marriage, Mutunus Tutunus, whose name is derived from two Latin slang words for penis. His name is essentially Dick Wiener. If you have ever wondered just how much like us the Romans were, read the etymology section

Oh look.

It’s a flying fuck.

It used to be given, and now look, it’s no more.

15 hours ago with 60146 notes — via smilingsword, org quotes-n-hoes



thegeek531:

suuzz123:

l-o-t-r:

pommellbloom:

“I said to Viggo, ‘I’m gonna put the camera down the hillside a little bit. Can you try to kick the helmet close to the lens? Because it will look great if it just flies past us.’


“And so Viggo did 4 takes. He boots this helmet. And then he let out the scream. I thought, ‘Wow! This is strong. This is like Aragorn is just in total grief at what’s happened to Merry and Pippin. This is really cool.’ He didn’t say anything to us…but we found out that Viggo had actually broken 2 toes with that last kick. Viggo actually feeling that pain, and turned that into a performance. He stayed in the character of Aragorn.”

Peter Jackson

VIGGO MORTENSEN

VIGGO INTENSIFIES

1 day ago with 41978 notes — via batlesbo, org pommellbloom



babygoatsandfriends:

ifoughtsohard:

As you may or may not know, I was gone on Saturday to visit my aunt and her baby goats.

It’s too cold for them outside so we set up a play pen for them in the living room. We had just put them in and they were a little nervous.

Holy FUCK its a symphony of BEEEHs and MEEEEHS

1 day ago with 1621 notes — via lizards-in-space, org ifoughtsohard



rubycosmos:

drkotobuki:

flawlessspecter:

hiccuptherunt:

sakurasunshine:

keep-calm-and-disney-on:

HERCULES IN THE 2ND GIF OMFG

THIS IS ACTUALLY REALLY IMPORTANT THOUGH

Hercules is THE DEFINITION of a gentleman. Her dress strap slips down and HE PUTS IT BACK UP because he’s like “No, she’s a lady, she deserves my respect. Control yourself. Leave, just leave.”

Imagine if all guys/girls had that much respect for people they were attracted to…the world would be a lot better and safer, I can tell you that.

Also have to remember he’s never had a girl actually hit on him before.

2nd gif: #zeUS TAKE THE WHEEL #I NEED AN ADULT #WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS

DON’T LET ZEUS TAKE THE WHEEL THOHE’LL DO NASTY NASTY THINGSBOTH TO MEG AND TO THE WHEEL,

Thanks ZJ.

1 day ago with 158779 notes — via lizards-in-space, org tooshaknowsbest



swanjolras:

thebrokenhunterandhisbrokenangel:

worldofdrakan:

its-heaven-nowadays:

More Macklemore, less Robin Thicke.

And yet a huge percentage of Tumblr hates him. Not trying to be confrontational, but could someone please explain to me why this is?

Because he is a straight white guy and Tumblr isn’t always right. 

oh my god if i have to see this post on my dashboard one more time
all right, okay. let’s talk.
last year on a slow day in law/society class, my teacher showed us a movie where charlize theron was one of the only female workers in a mine in minnesota. she experienced a fuckload of sexual harassment, ofc; it was when she started daring to complain about the sexual harassment that shit got really bad.
i remember watching charlize theron go through all these awful things, and i remember getting vaguely invested in her as a heroine; yeah, you go charlize theron, you continue to work despite these harassment and assaults, you stand up for yourself when people shun you in the community, etc
and there was this climactic scene where the miners’ union was having a meeting, and charlize theron was going up to complain about something or tell people she was suing the company or smth, i can’t remember, and she stood there in front of this huge crowd of angry men who were booing her and catcalling her and shouting the worst things at her and she’s getting really miserable
and then her father, who also works at the mine, goes up and says “hey, you’re all jerks, think of your mothers & daughters, would you treat them this way,” and the miners are like “oh wow charlize theron totally does deserve our support etc” and then the movie continues
but all i could think was— what, so they’ll listen to a man but not to the woman who’s actually affected? why doesn’t charlize theron get to save the day and be the hero? in a conversation about sexism, why is his voice more important than hers?
we’re not mad at macklemore. or— well, we are mad at macklemore, but we’re more mad at the system that prioritizes macklemore over actual queer rappers, over actual rappers of color, who have been saying exactly the same shit for decades and been ignored.
we’re mad at the system that gives more attention to straight allies than queer activists.
we’re mad at the system that only supports queer rights when they are quiet and polite and have cute graphics.
we’re mad at the system that makes macklemore a hero of of the queer struggle but doesn’t know marsha p. johnson’s name.
we’re mad at the system that will listen to macklemore when he comes to defend us— but won’t listen to us.
we’re mad at the system that has constructed itself to make damn certain that only straight cis white boys can be heroes.
it’s fuckin’ great that macklemore thought he was gay in third grade. but the system would rather give his third grade gay freakout the spotlight than our actual whole-life queer experiences— and that’s not okay.

swanjolras:

thebrokenhunterandhisbrokenangel:

worldofdrakan:

its-heaven-nowadays:

More Macklemore, less Robin Thicke.

And yet a huge percentage of Tumblr hates him. Not trying to be confrontational, but could someone please explain to me why this is?

Because he is a straight white guy and Tumblr isn’t always right. 

oh my god if i have to see this post on my dashboard one more time

all right, okay. let’s talk.

last year on a slow day in law/society class, my teacher showed us a movie where charlize theron was one of the only female workers in a mine in minnesota. she experienced a fuckload of sexual harassment, ofc; it was when she started daring to complain about the sexual harassment that shit got really bad.

i remember watching charlize theron go through all these awful things, and i remember getting vaguely invested in her as a heroine; yeah, you go charlize theron, you continue to work despite these harassment and assaults, you stand up for yourself when people shun you in the community, etc

and there was this climactic scene where the miners’ union was having a meeting, and charlize theron was going up to complain about something or tell people she was suing the company or smth, i can’t remember, and she stood there in front of this huge crowd of angry men who were booing her and catcalling her and shouting the worst things at her and she’s getting really miserable

and then her father, who also works at the mine, goes up and says “hey, you’re all jerks, think of your mothers & daughters, would you treat them this way,” and the miners are like “oh wow charlize theron totally does deserve our support etc” and then the movie continues

but all i could think was— what, so they’ll listen to a man but not to the woman who’s actually affected? why doesn’t charlize theron get to save the day and be the hero? in a conversation about sexism, why is his voice more important than hers?

we’re not mad at macklemore. or— well, we are mad at macklemore, but we’re more mad at the system that prioritizes macklemore over actual queer rappers, over actual rappers of color, who have been saying exactly the same shit for decades and been ignored.

we’re mad at the system that gives more attention to straight allies than queer activists.

we’re mad at the system that only supports queer rights when they are quiet and polite and have cute graphics.

we’re mad at the system that makes macklemore a hero of of the queer struggle but doesn’t know marsha p. johnson’s name.

we’re mad at the system that will listen to macklemore when he comes to defend us— but won’t listen to us.

we’re mad at the system that has constructed itself to make damn certain that only straight cis white boys can be heroes.

it’s fuckin’ great that macklemore thought he was gay in third grade. but the system would rather give his third grade gay freakout the spotlight than our actual whole-life queer experiences— and that’s not okay.

1 day ago with 545006 notes — via musical-homestuck-fandom, org its-heaven-nowadays



tyleroakley:

witchhctiw:

the-solitary-witch:

warriorsatthedisco:

littlestmowreader:

nivena:

sload:

gill-bear-toe:

gill-bear-toe:

someone-inconspicuous:

what the fuck is this shit

release the penguins

insert peanuts

are those ten fortes

I see two dinosaurs nuzzling each other.

EIGHT NOTE CHORDS? What instrument(s) is this for? An octopus??

Its called the Death Waltz, and was written as a joke but people have attempted it on piano.

Saxes move downstage.

I’ll just leave this here.

SWEET JESUS CLICK THAT

tyleroakley:

witchhctiw:

the-solitary-witch:

warriorsatthedisco:

littlestmowreader:

nivena:

sload:

gill-bear-toe:

gill-bear-toe:

someone-inconspicuous:

what the fuck is this shit

release the penguins

insert peanuts

are those ten fortes

I see two dinosaurs nuzzling each other.

EIGHT NOTE CHORDS? What instrument(s) is this for? An octopus??

Its called the Death Waltz, and was written as a joke but people have attempted it on piano.

Saxes move downstage.

I’ll just leave this here.

SWEET JESUS CLICK THAT

1 day ago with 107972 notes — via smilingsword, org someone-inconspicuous